Hey guys,
I know it's been a while and that it's only the second post in this series, but I hope the wait was worthwhile. Here comes:
What Really Irritates Me In Men, Women and Poodles, and Other Sartorial Considerations Very Late at Night - Part 2
I met a poodle the other day, at a relative's. I write 'met' because I was led to disbelieve that it was a normal dog and had a persona of its own. That she - for it was a she - literally had a character quite peculiar to her and the tenacity of a dog on a bone. This one rather had a hangdog look, with lots of hair and an indecently long fringe covering its/her eyes. I was wondering how it/she made its way between people's legs without bumping into them. Fact is, it/she couldn't. Not all the time. But with eponymous dogged determination it - she, SHE - pursued calculating angles of approach at the last second and avoiding collision, not avoiding collision. Worst thing was that when someone just patted her on the head, she couldn't help herself and had to relieve the content of her bladder on the floor. So you could follow her path in the house by leaning at light's angle and spot the tiny, light-yellow droplets. Well, I guess my aunt was right, this...dog definitely has a character of her own.
Delicacies abound in our world.
I particularly distaste the people who do not smash their cigarette stubs underfoot. I always think they could save a few atoms of oxygen.
Pigeons
that fly right above your head could drive me to buy a gun and start an aviary war.
People
who go to Chinese restaurants and who obstinately try to
eat with chopsticks and can't are mildly irritating. I'd rather see them skew the food rather than hold the chopsticks in each hand like
pens or garden forks and take up the food from the plate from each side.
I have seen a few feathered birds wearing sunglasses inside a building or at night when there's only one streetlamp. Fashion never got so blind.
Lunches with old people who rant about the government and the immigrants and the social security and insecurity and blahblahblah and the state of their prostate and blood levels re-blahblahblah what can we do it's the ways of the youth and I really liked the old Franc system and Charles Martel could have done a better job re-re-blahblahblah I really like your napkins and the carrots were cooked to perfection and my uncle Robert had a glass eye and a wooden leg blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahblahblah the price of the petrol wasn't the same before the war - yes, the Gulf war - no, no, after World War II blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah really make my amygdala and angular gyrus go banana.I could throw a spider monkey at them. And those are helluva nasty bastards, 'scuse my French.
I now have a heartfelt antipathy against the men and women, girls, boys, brats, old badgers and cronies who don't care a whit when they see a wheelchair, in distress or not. Luckily, there are still nice people to help you push it.
I wondered the other day if I hadn't become cantankerous before my time.
