Missing

—

something

amiss

off

unthere

—

missing someone

is hard on the heart

—

guts twisted like a wet rag

with every single recollection

—

shivved in the chest

at the first memory

with a notched blade

grazing bones, tissues

exposing the flesh

so it cannot heal

—

every DNA monomer

branded, rewired, retranslated

so even the sense of smell

gets tricked into thinking

– the memories are real –

– the missing isn’t missed –

only to each time find out

– the heart heaving as

going down a steep slope –

that the missing is decohered

– neither here and – nor – there –

unable to freeze it into place

if one stares at it long enough

– love unaffected by

any law of physics –

—

the air unbreathable as

every pulmonary alveolus

collapses like a promise

when holding it fails

– the only option is to hold

– breath, attention, heart –

and sit still – so very still –

counting heartbeats to zero

until infinity hits

—

missing someone

is hard on the heart

– shattering its walls –

– supposedly denser

than the core

of a neutron star –

into absolute smithereens

– its ash to be repurposed

but for now, for what, for what

—

missing someone

is hard on the heart

– but missing someone

you’re never to see again

– that lays the heart

to unequivocal waste.